Headphones in

Being surrounded by the universe makes you sometimes forget, that you are also very much it.

What do you really feel?

"Are these feelings even real or are they just programming? "


I think this quote really begs the question of which feelings we have really are real. I told this quote to a friend once and said it can be applied to humans and he didn't understand what I meant. Probably also thought I was stupid.


Let me explain.


Last year I read a book titled "The mysterious flame" that explored what is it to be a conscious human being. It gave scenarios such as, well our brain is meat, maybe special meat, but it's meat, and that meat has an electrical current running through it. If so, If we ran the same current through brain tissue, would that result in consciousness? Duh no we need the whole body as a unit stupid. Okay. So we established that possibly our senses, sight, touch, taste, etc. may aid in our ability to perceive (or be conscious). So if we made a vessel alike to a human body, filled it with all the organs, electrical impulses, tissue, all the physiology of a human and hooked it up to a machine that pumped its' heart and provided it with energy to undergo regular bodily activities. Would we then have a conscious human being?


So what are our feelings? How are they a program? If I took a baseball bat to your knee what would your body feel? It would hurt. A lot. But did you tell your body, hey this hurts, or did your body initiate this feeling? Your body made you feel pain whether or not you wanted to. It is "programmed" to do so. So in the big picture, what does this mean? It means everything if you want to be in control of how you really feel. I am in no way saying that going against the program is always advisable. There are circumstances where you need to express the energy in your body the way your body needs to express it (crying, laughing, for example).


There is a distinction that needs to be found from the program. Taking a step back and asking yourself well why do I feel this way? There are many times that you realize, there is no good reason for you to be feeling so angry, sad, stressed, or whatever negative feeling it may be.

Crow

A Squawking crow, Flapping its' dark feathers.

Headphones in

Make your own lyrics.

Alone

From childhood’s hour I have not been

As others were—I have not seen

As others saw—I could not bring

My passions from a common spring—

From the same source I have not taken

My sorrow—I could not awaken

My heart to joy at the same tone—

And all I lov’d—I lov’d alone—

Then—in my childhood—in the dawn

Of a most stormy life—was drawn

From ev’ry depth of good and ill

The mystery which binds me still—

From the torrent, or the fountain—

From the red cliff of the mountain—

From the sun that ’round me roll’d

In its autumn tint of gold—

From the lightning in the sky

As it pass’d me flying by—

From the thunder, and the storm—

And the cloud that took the form

(When the rest of Heaven was blue)

Of a demon in my view—

-Edgar Allan Poe

In Existence

Bleakly she stared down,
Emersed seemingly into nothing as if something,
As if anything.

Her features now imperceptible
Yet the Ghost of the stare remains,
Drifting shadowlessly through the walls of my cerebrum.

The seat before her empty,
Now filled with me,
-Still nothing.
Unnoticed.

I dug for words, 
for something,
Anything,
Unnoticed I glanced around
Searching, Screening, Sifting
Until I saw it.
I had let myself slip into everything

She had been seeing,

Into nothing.

Halls of the Summer

A ghost I'm glad I got to dance with.