Headphones in

 I usually go through seasons of music genres. I'll listen to one genre predominately for a while. I always find instrumental music to be some of the best out there.

Second favorite song by Zack Hemsey. The power in all of his pieces is unbelievable. Real music, real art, makes you feel something incredible.

Hide n' seek

A hiding game they play 

Camouflaging to where they believe they can't be found

 A rather novice mistake. 

 Those who know hide where they really can't be found. 

A place so hidden one would think not to look in

 In plain sight one cannot be found

 behind the blended crowd,

 The repetitious tasks,

The monotony,

the smile

You cannot find where you are not searching

Sometimes you find art in the strangest places

Some say love is a burning thing
That it makes a fiery ring
Oh but I know love as a fading thing
Just as fickle as a feather in a stream
See, honey, I saw love,
You see it came to me
It puts its face up to my face so I could see
Yeah then I saw love disfigure me
Into something I am not recognizing

See the cage, it called. I said, come on in
I will not open myself up this way again
Nor lay my face to the soil, nor my teeth to the sand
I will not lay like this for days now upon end
You will not see me fall, nor see me struggle to stand
To be acknowledged by some touch from his gnarled hands
You see the cage it called. I said, come on in
I will not open myself this way again.

You see the moon is bright in that treetop night
I see the shadows that we cast in the cold clean light
I might fear I go and my heart is white
And we race right out on the desert plains all night
So honey I am now, some broken thing
I do not lay in the dark waiting for day here
Now my heart is gold, my feet are right
And I'm racing out on the desert plains all night

So some say love is a burning thing
That it makes a fiery ring
All that I know love as a caging thing
Just a killer come to call from some awful dream
And all you folks, you come to see
You just to stand there in the glass looking at me
But my heart is wild, and my bones are steel
And I could kill you with my bare hands if I was free

Headphones in

Being surrounded by the universe makes you sometimes forget, that you are also very much it.

What do you really feel?

"Are these feelings even real or are they just programming? "


I think this quote really begs the question of which feelings we have really are real. I told this quote to a friend once and said it can be applied to humans and he didn't understand what I meant. Probably also thought I was stupid.


Let me explain.


Last year I read a book titled "The mysterious flame" that explored what is it to be a conscious human being. It gave scenarios such as, well our brain is meat, maybe special meat, but it's meat, and that meat has an electrical current running through it. If so, If we ran the same current through brain tissue, would that result in consciousness? Duh no we need the whole body as a unit stupid. Okay. So we established that possibly our senses, sight, touch, taste, etc. may aid in our ability to perceive (or be conscious). So if we made a vessel alike to a human body, filled it with all the organs, electrical impulses, tissue, all the physiology of a human and hooked it up to a machine that pumped its' heart and provided it with energy to undergo regular bodily activities. Would we then have a conscious human being?


So what are our feelings? How are they a program? If I took a baseball bat to your knee what would your body feel? It would hurt. A lot. But did you tell your body, hey this hurts, or did your body initiate this feeling? Your body made you feel pain whether or not you wanted to. It is "programmed" to do so. So in the big picture, what does this mean? It means everything if you want to be in control of how you really feel. I am in no way saying that going against the program is always advisable. There are circumstances where you need to express the energy in your body the way your body needs to express it (crying, laughing, for example).


There is a distinction that needs to be found from the program. Taking a step back and asking yourself well why do I feel this way? There are many times that you realize, there is no good reason for you to be feeling so angry, sad, stressed, or whatever negative feeling it may be.

Crow

A Squawking crow, Flapping its' dark feathers.

Headphones in

Make your own lyrics.

Alone

From childhood’s hour I have not been

As others were—I have not seen

As others saw—I could not bring

My passions from a common spring—

From the same source I have not taken

My sorrow—I could not awaken

My heart to joy at the same tone—

And all I lov’d—I lov’d alone—

Then—in my childhood—in the dawn

Of a most stormy life—was drawn

From ev’ry depth of good and ill

The mystery which binds me still—

From the torrent, or the fountain—

From the red cliff of the mountain—

From the sun that ’round me roll’d

In its autumn tint of gold—

From the lightning in the sky

As it pass’d me flying by—

From the thunder, and the storm—

And the cloud that took the form

(When the rest of Heaven was blue)

Of a demon in my view—

-Edgar Allan Poe

In Existence

Bleakly she stared down,
Emersed seemingly into nothing as if something,
As if anything.

Her features now imperceptible
Yet the Ghost of the stare remains,
Drifting shadowlessly through the walls of my cerebrum.

The seat before her empty,
Now filled with me,
-Still nothing.
Unnoticed.

I dug for words, 
for something,
Anything,
Unnoticed I glanced around
Searching, Screening, Sifting
Until I saw it.
I had let myself slip into everything

She had been seeing,

Into nothing.

Halls of the Summer

A ghost I'm glad I got to dance with.

In a Dark Time

In a dark time, the eye begins to see,

I meet my shadow in the deepening shade;   

I hear my echo in the echoing wood—

A lord of nature weeping to a tree.

I live between the heron and the wren,   

Beasts of the hill and serpents of the den.

What’s madness but nobility of soul

At odds with circumstance? The day’s on fire!   

I know the purity of pure despair,

My shadow pinned against a sweating wall.   

That place among the rocks—is it a cave,   

Or winding path? The edge is what I have.

A steady storm of correspondences!

A night flowing with birds, a ragged moon,   

And in broad day the midnight come again!   

A man goes far to find out what he is—

Death of the self in a long, tearless night,   

All natural shapes blazing unnatural light.

Dark, dark my light, and darker my desire.   

My soul, like some heat-maddened summer fly,   

Keeps buzzing at the sill. Which I is I?

A fallen man, I climb out of my fear.   

The mind enters itself, and God the mind,   

And one is One, free in the tearing wind.

-Theodore Roethke

Being a lion in a field of lions

"You're a lion in a field of lions all hunting the same elusive prey with a desperate starvation that says, victory is the only way to survive."

Many people speak about being a lion amongst sheep. The idea that you have to separate yourself from the pack and be dominant. That situation is less than ideal. You wouldn't have to try to catch and kill your prey (your goals) or compete with any other predators (opponents/obstacles). You would be a big fish in a small pond and although it would be great to dominate, your opponents, goals, dreams,are bigger and greater than any amount of sheep. If they aren't, what's the point?

A mindset of domination isn't a bad mindset, but would you fight harder as a lion among sheep or a lion among other lions? My mind set will forever be that I am already that lion, as should anybody elses, as confidence and FAITH are important if you want to achieve anything meaningful to you. Knowing the fact that you are a lion comes with the daunting fact that there are other lions just as hungry, fierce, pissed off and strong as you are and they want everything you want. The only way to beat them and eat at the end of the day is to fight like hell. You are not amongst the sheep.